Toys R Us Kid

Yesterday, after being prompted by my boyfriend's purchase of a rather expensive toy helicopter last week, I bought a RC car. It's about 1/10 the scale of a real Jeep Wrangler Rubicon and has tires that make up half the height of the whole vehicle. It's ridiculous, one of the most frivolous purchases I have made in quite some time. It actually ended up being $30 less than listed on the shelf at my local Toys R Us. But I cannot wait to get that thing out in the driveway and jumping over boxes. Like a good female, I read the instructions and it says to charge the battery for a minimum of 8 hours, drain the battery completely and charge again, for another 8 hours. Now, I'm an adult, I am usually reasonably good at waiting patiently for things I want but this is killing me. I have the Jeep, the controller, some boxes to make a jump, and the cat to chase around the house, for the love of wireless toys will you please charge FASTER! I cannot wait to have children and put them through this waiting game. Or better yet, I will be forced to do it for them so they learn that instant gratification is grand. So I'll have to play with my kid's toys. . . for them. . . before they do. . . darn.


I think I'm looking for failure.
Not in my own life but in the things around me. There is a tree on the drive down to work that has uprooted itself and is now precariously hanging over the road from the crotch of another tree. It's like a never ending countdown to when it will come crashing down, most likely on some one's unsuspecting car. I watching it grow closer and closer to circum to gravity every day. I am waiting for failure.

During a break between toy helicopter and plane flying I laid out on the driveway and looked up at the gigantic redwoods beside me. Why is it that they grow branches on only one side? Are they only specialized on collecting sunlight from that one direction? What about the trees that have branches all around them? Are they multi-taskers? Are humans like this? Is there one dead core thing that unites us at our roots and then we grow out to specialize in other things?

Can we learn more?

I feel like I have said this all my life. I don't want to dominate in any subject really. I just want to learn more. I want to be a tree with branches stretched out to the sun in all directions. I want to reach more knowledge.