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I am home to hang out with my dad this week and get some much needed support from some old friends. I don't know why but the sympathy and offers of help I get from all these people that have been in my life for less than a year feel kind of empty. I know they mean well and there are some who genuinely care (I got sick a few days ago and I mentioned I wanted some apple juice and my housemate brought some home that night, he's not all bad) but they didn't know my dad or know our relationship so it's hard for them to comprehend the heaviness that this is.

Talked to my ex the other day about the cat. Though he never really cared for my cat he did live with him for a year so I felt it was important to tell him. We had a good chat and caught up on the world... looks like he's moving to the East coast soon and I doubt we'll talk after that. I think we're both okay with that.

Got to see my friend's little boy when he picked me up from the airport. This friend is amazing... he's the only one who has ever picked me up from the airport since I moved north. Seeing kids right now makes me kind of melancholy. I'm happy to see new and full life but at the same time really really sad that I might not be able to share that same experience in my life with my Daddy.

I'm not sure he'll make it the rest of the year. But greater miracles have happened and I am blessed for every day that I still have him.

Sister went to Disneyland for her boyfriend's birthday today. Her birthday is on Wednesday... I am researching presents and everyone seems to be real excited about happy family time.

I love family time even more now and I'm not sure how that was even possible.